I keep coming back to this.
Posted on 18 Feb 2008
Popular atheist, Sam Harris criticizes Christians because they are often motivated to feed the hungry, love their enemy, etc. not because of their love for people, but because of their fear of God’s wrath. This is akin to how I love. I am driven by my fear of pain; I’ll keep you happy enough to prevent my own hurt, disappointment, embarrassment, or strife. At my very best I can choose to love someone because they are God’s creation, or they reflect the image of God, but even then, I am operating out of obedience in order to score points in eternity. Is obedience to God’s mandate, love? Sure, but I can’t imagine being driven out of simple obedience. I can’t name a good reason to love. Perhaps you begin to love out of self-serving efforts and then it becomes something that just feels good for everyone and you don’t rely on a motive. Doing something that feels good–how trivial. Love feels good, I suppose. I’ve rarely been there. In the end…. every lover for them self.
This is such blathering.
david herring
19 Feb 2008 (09:21)
zadok, this is really thoughtful and heartfelt. thanks for the transparency.
suj'n
3 Mar 2008 (19:19)
i never thought loving because it feels good as trivial. but, okay-if that’s what it is, i choose to be trivial. to me, feeling good is a REALLY good reason to love. happy pills without a prescription.
on a somewhat related note, there’s a *brilliant* book called “A General Theory of Love” i highly recommend. it’s an analysis of love from intertwined biological, psychological, anthropological, artistic, and spiritual perspectives. i mean, BRILLIANT.
jennifer l grabarczyk
11 Mar 2008 (21:26)
i always look for a good excuse to use this quote…so, here you go. “it is not where we breathe, but where we love that we live.” (kierkegaard). this… trips me… often. maybe everything that has to do with love has the potential to be taken over by selfishness or something else in the end, but to love – to find love or let love find us – feels akin to when moments of inspiration find us. the moments don’t last forever, but they can fuel us beyond time’s barriers and for.. quite awhile…in time’s reach. the annoying thing about love is its capacity to take us over when we least expect it. it seems obedience can’t really touch that, though it’d be nice if obedience had a direct correlation to moments of inspiration. maybe so, though. what does the musician think?
Brandon Duncan
3 Apr 2008 (16:43)
Hmmm… I identify with what you say about motives for loving actions. Lord knows my narcissism is rarely contended with. Lately though, I have had these absurd moments of compassion for people who have deeply betrayed me and can truly say that this love was, for the moment, remarkable, in ways selfless, but most of all felt incredibly human. It feels good to love, of course, but maybe instead of questioning whether we are motivated by our own desire to “feel good” avoid pain, etc. We can live in these moments more deeply by enjoying them more deeply, not less. Maybe it is because we don’t truly ENJOY love enough that we still get caught into our self-absorbed traps. If loving others offers self gratification it is because we were meant for it. We are always capable of being self-gratifying and self serving, but we are equally as capable of being selfless. I truly believe this. I am a die hard cynic myself, and find most of my life reference and identification with cynicism and borderline nihilism, but there are always these moments, these ephemeral glimpses that keep me alive, keep me believing that gospel exists, that to be human is to be good. I believe nihilism is good, necessary even at times, but only because as the cynic slowly emerges from the cave, in that motion, that movement, and it is always movement, in and out, that is where somewhere, a life worth living exists….
Hmmm…. I think this may just as equally be blathering nonsense.
Thanks for this blog.